Friday, April 13, 2007

Un Credible Source

I had this most amazing conversation with my son last night.

Schools have become so entrepreneurial nowadays. Yesterday they were taught how to make nimbu-paani (lemonade, for the unintiated).

I have always harbored this wish – I will not do anything to achieve it because I have always been a firm believer of free will – but I have wished for my son to become a great chef, or a mystical painter, or a fulfilled star, and always that perfect musician.
You see we do not try to live our dreams through our kids just relive them.

It is in this context of free will that I had this brilliant conversation

I called up from work in the afternoon to figure out if the TV was on. Stupid, coz the TV is always on.
He may be drawing, eating, trying to read or just plain dozing off, but, the TV is always on.

I was informed in the sweetest voice I had heard since 7 in the morning – “Mom, I know how to make nimbu paani”

Me, in my proudest mommy voice – “woooow betu, u’re a genius” (I’m slightly prone to exaggerated demonstration where hes concerned)

Him – “so what are we doing in the evening?” (Kids have changed, haven’t they..)

Me – “I’ll come home baby and, we’ll have ur nimbu paani” (simple questions demand stupidly obvious answers)

Him – “koi aa nahi raha kya” (which is an incredulous “noones coming or what?” because we love having friends over every second day)

Me – “Don’t know baby,,,why?”

Him – “Arre kisi ko toh bula lo” (frustrated request - just call someone, ok)

Me (understanding my son oh so well) – “arre baby I’ll have ur nimbu paani”

Him – “But I want to know achcha hai ki nahi”

Me – “So I’ll tell you betu” (haha…I will make him a confident child through constant appreciation - I’m his mother and I will do it)

Him – “Mom, u will never ever tell me if its bad na…u’ll always say “betu kamaal hai”..u just love me and so u’ll lie”

Me (anxious, agitated, fighting for credibility…whatever…really want him to see me as a honest yardstick now – “nahin nahin ishu I’ll really tell u”

Him, hard hearted, cruel, dismissive – “no call someone na …I want to know really”

I still haven’t gotten over this conversation. It raises so many thoughts, and, challenges the way I think and act.

I have always believed that I do not have to be the bitter pill my friends and family need to swallow to be made aware of realities around them or about themselves.
Learning is entirely self motivated and time gratified.

Its not only my son who has questioned my unflinching devotion (haha, couldn’t think of another phrase for it) and declared it to be soppy love.

I remember when I was growing up I used to take my mom’s love for granted and dad used to be the person who’s approval mattered.
My mom used to love it that way too.
After I got married, I realized my mom’s values. Those values have held me strong and made me the person I am today.

I learnt from her that no love is ever enough and it is always enough to love…

And, I will stay with that…

By the way, the nimbu paani was tested and approved (both parties were immensely satisfied by the audit) by someone who has difficulty believing the feedback I give too.

Source Un credible, he says.

One day, Source Incredible is what it’ll become….


Shome said...

bachcha bada ho raha hai.. I thought he knew how to make nimbu paani already.. Didnt he threaten to charge your guests for money after a party once for the nimbu paani?

You know this love thingy is so true. My friend los his mother yesterday in an accident. Auto got hit by truck. He is in the US, scrambling to get back. He is also in the process of beating himself up for not calling her this Sunday (was too busy) and not talking properly hundreds of times as 'parents calls are so irritating'.. today when she is gone, he realises what he does not have. The unconditional love of a mother. And its a very lonely feeling.. We dont celebrate it when we have the chance, and we rue it when its gone..

svety said...

ya but that was in prep. This is Nimbu Paani,the 1B way....
threaten wouldn't have been so bad..he actually asked me if we had to take money from them post giving them nimbu paani, insinuating that it was Mommy induced...haha

Tragic for ur friend...

Satyabrat Sinha said...

I love these stories of your son. This was priceless. Gives us more.

Manish said...

best story( if i can call it that) of the month...these conversations with our children are so endearing always! great post svety!

Minal said...

Cook or no cook. I am his ardent fan.